My Second Word of Intention and Focus for the Year: Presence

Last week, I shared my first word of focus and intention for the year- priority. I also wrote that I’d reveal my second word in a subsequent post. After reflecting on some of the challenges I experienced last year, I decided to pick presence. Presence can have many meanings, but I have chosen one to concentrate on that will help me walk away from distraction and towards more intentional daily choices.

I Almost Missed It- What Presence Means to Me

I was deep in concentration, reading the latest news on my iPad and enjoying the last few bites of my oatmeal. The house was quiet except for the rhythmic snores of the beagles on the couch.

By chance, I looked up at just the right moment to see that the sky had erupted in a beautiful sunrise. The clouds were pink, the sun crested over the homes in brilliant orange, and the lake shimmered in pink and orange with the ducks making swim trails in the reflection.

I ran outside with my phone to grab some photos of the sunrise before it disappeared.

A few minutes later, the pink and orange turned into the light blue and white of the morning sky.

Had I not looked up at that moment and switched my focus to the sunrise, I would have missed it.

The lights and colors on my iPad screen were masking the majesty of the sunrise. I wasn’t experiencing the sensory explosion of colors in the crisp morning air because I had been enraptured by scrolling on my device.

When I stepped into the sunrise, my soul awakened. The chill of the cold patio on my bare feet reverberated up my legs while the orange and pink light enveloped me into the scene. I became fully present in that scene. The Monday morning mental cobwebs dissipated.

This is presence.  

Defining Presence- Looking it Up in the Dictionary

Before I delve into more discussion over what I intend for presence to look like in my life this year, I decided to look the word up. While I knew what the word meant to me, I wanted to see if my vision was lining up with the actual definition.

Presence- noun (Dictionary.com): the state or fact of being present, as with others or in a place.

I looked up present as well.

Present (adjective) (Dictionary.com definition 9) focused on or involved in what one is doing at a particular moment

As I watched the sky unfurl into the glorious colors of morning, I was being present in the moment. I was experiencing the sunrise. I was embodying the idea of presence.

Am I Being Present In My Day-to-Day?

In my distracted life, it is hard to remain focused and present. As I began this writing session, I turned my devices into “Focus” mode so that only a few people could reach me. I don’t need my computer notifying me if I have an email while I’m working on this post. I need to take action to remain present in this activity. I put on my noise-cancelling headphones to ignore the conference calls going on in the next room. I want to focus on these words fully.

I’ve been reading a lot about what happens to our brains when we get distracted. Did you know that it can take an average of 23 minutes to get back on task when we are interrupted? As I was trying to pick the best link for this concept, I was searching for at least 10 minutes. I managed to get quite distracted. Which article should I link to? Which one would make the most sense?

It is hard to remain present when we have instant access to information.

So, as I work to increase my focus on high-priority activities- like writing- I need to work on my muscle of presence. How do I stay engaged on a difficult task for enough time to make progress? It isn’t as glorious to type the words out on my screen as it was to experience the sunrise, but my presence is just as significant.

Presence is Great- But Sometimes We Need Absence Too

Not all moments in our lives need our full presence. Sometimes it is easier and healthier to be physically or mentally absent for a while.

When I show up at a doctor’s appointment, my phone goes on do not disturb, and I pull out the Disney Emoji. While I am waiting, I typically get anxious and worried. If I get wrapped up – overly present- in the swirl of emotions, whatever procedure I’m facing will get more difficult.

This worry became most evident during my biopsies. During my first one, I asked my radiologist about the technology involved in a mammogram-guided biopsy. She began telling me all about what would happen, and the next thing I knew, I was passing out during the procedure.

That was not the type of presence I was aiming for. So clearly, being present and aware of the biopsy procedure wasn’t an effective coping technique for me.

I recently discovered that while I’m in an MRI tube all alone with the banging and clanging, I feel the anxiety welling up in me. The last one I had on my shoulder was the most terrifying one I have had to date. If I focus on being present in the scan, I risk another incident of panic.

So, during these times of medical care, I have worked out a system of mental absence to get through it. I play fun games on my phone until it is time for my procedure. Then, once the scan or procedure begins, I work through it with my visualization. I use every tool in my imagination to be absent from the situation. I slow my breathing, close my eyes, and imagine I am anywhere but there.

Absence helps me cope- but only when I use it effectively. Sometimes I find myself absent from my family and scrolling through social media. I might be physically present, but I’m mentally absent. Those times of mental and emotional absence leave me dissatisfied. I miss the expressions on my loved one’s faces as they tell me their stories. I’m not choosing to be present with them, and I miss out.

Presence for the Times That Need It

As I l focus on presence this year, I will keep in my mind that moment when I looked up from an insignificant news article to see the sky explode in colors. I will aim this year to be present at the right times. That morning, it was to experience an unforgettable sunrise.

Thus far, I’ve shared two of my words for the year with you. The first was priority– you can read the post here– and today was presence.

I have one more word of focus and intention to share next week. It is a word that holds two meanings for me, and I’m looking forward to writing more about it. Feel free to subscribe to my email list if you’d like to be notified when I post it. Or, you can follow me on IG or Twitter. I share my thoughts daily there, and I’d love to connect with you.

Do you have a word or words for the year? If so, what did you pick? How have you been living them these past few weeks?